So, obvious you already know who this is despite my sad attempt of starting anew.
I would like to seriously regret my choices since the start of my offensive regime. I have no limit to what I say and I was always at fault for it, definitely well-aware as I'd be after the fact. I don't like being a terrible hindrance to people and that's what I initially thought that it was the cause of my childish and distasteful way of handling the situation. However, there is no excuse for it, regardless.
I'm not someone who wants to be mean. I don't express intention other than what I actually DO express because of how poorly I present my actions. I realize this, and I can't blindly say "it's because of this that i do that" as if I was influenced by anything other than my poor attitude. I'm too old for doing things of such nature.
I completely apologize for the insults that were directed towards you and everyone else. I apologize for being so needy and so melancholy, all around making the game for myself and others not fun. And I especially, most definitely apologize towards the things I've said in chatbox on an near-daily basis. I'm not regularly a happy person, but that doesn't mean I should disrespect everyone that I talk to or even play with.
I just feel ashamed for how badly my experience with this server and community ended up, and how it could have been easily avoided if I took time away from it rather than just shooting a barrage of insults and sulking in self pity. The things I've said and acted were absolutely levels of me reaching a new low. I'm just not that much of a person who socializes and you can clearly see that through the way I acted towards others.
Those horrible and disgusting names and things I've said about others and you (which I REALLY would never have done in a right frame of mind) legitimately made me feel sick in the mind. That's not me. That's a part of me that I do not want to give the light of day at all.
I do not expect anything of you to be done here. I'm not going to lie, I would love to start anew, but I know it would be against the rules and I've pretty much ostracized myself from the community in the first place. I am only coming here because when I leave something hastily, I cannot leave without repenting my inexcusable regret to everyone I encountered.
I would like to thank you for being a great moderator and everything I've said to you was an impulsive reaction in the heat of the night. Before you ban this account, I would like to repost the message on the boards because I want everyone that I have known and helped me in one way or another to see how much this game, server, and the help from the community did mean to me while playing.
Thank you for reading.