April Fools Mini-Event: Roast a Fool

[MemeDream]

You produce so much smegma, your penis looks like a glazed donut.

Some people make bacon-grease sandwiches; you just stick the butterknife down your pants.

One time you went jogging and your dick flopped out of your shorts; people thought it had begun snowing. Children made snowmen out of it.

Remember the Paul Bunyan story about the chefs who skated around the griddle with butter on their shoes? In reality they just had you slide around the pan.

You've never needed to buy earplugs.

You sculpt yourself rococo powdered wigs and roll up your stockings and skip gaily about the town.

You've made it rich by contracting with women's facial mask producers. Cucumber slices? Mud? So passe.

The Dutch use you to build their dykes.

You once emptied and refilled your roommate's toothpaste bottle and no one was the wiser.

You sell old-timey candles, for homes to feel quaint

By packing together the cheese of your taint

[TripleR]

Hahahaha alright I should probably close this. I will announce the winner later

[TripleR]

Although I'd like to thank everyone that took a jab after much thought I must announce CCastles93 as the winner!! You may claim your prize next time you see me!

[Fyrewolf5]

On 4/1/2017 at 1:21 PM, radezz said:

I call this SSS (Silver Spitting Sick)

Here's my two cents
though im no fifty cent.

But for those fifty pds
I guess i'll represent.

I'll call this SSS
Cause RRR comes before me.
And he dont impress,
All his talking just bores me.

For a good roast, first smolder:
His ego? Only thing that's large.
(Puts a hand on his shoulder)
Do you feel in charge?

This goes out to you,
To my bro RRR,
Imma tell you right through,
Imma tell you what you are:

He thinks he's the best,
He thinks he's so smart,
But he's just like the rest,
A pompous old fart.

With a big sense of self,
And a small manhood,
He acts besides himself
To pretend he's from the hood.

He always knows better,
Have you even seen a boob?
He misspelled the one letter,
spell much, (RRR) noob?

All bark and no bite, 
He swears he's scary,
Yeah thats him alright,
A f*****g harmless teddy.

Been called a poser,
And a keyboard warrior,
Only true one is the former,
I can beat you with a barrier.

Silver Spitting Sick,
Sick rhymes, that is,
Cause RRRs mental d**k
Is as small as his real p***s

So to you I now toast,
And to the pds I just earned,
I know you wanted a roast,
But you just got BuRRRned.

Cheers <3

If you are gonna claim to be "spitting sick", the least you could do is not use an identical rhyme on the first two lines...

[radezz]

4 hours ago, Fyrewolf5 said:

If you are gonna claim to be "spitting sick", the least you could do is not use an identical rhyme on the first two lines...

the hell is your problem @Fyrewolf5  ?

spitting sick is just me ironically showing off, as if id actually say that and mean it. 

also while it may not have been a perfect rhyme, it is totally acceptable in rap to rhyme a word with a proper Name of someone. besides it was a way to introduce the audience to the rest of the verses, so the rhyme wasnt so im portant on that first one.

also also, why do you chose to put me down instead of complimenting 1 or 2 other good verses i may have written?

[TripleR]

Yeah I thought it was really good, and also in grime which in undeniably a form of rap that is often seen

[MadOrNah]

1 minute ago, radezz said:

the hell is your problem @Fyrewolf5  ?

spitting sick is just me ironically showing off, as if id actually say that and mean it. 

also while it may not have been a perfect rhyme, it is totally acceptable in rap to rhyme a word with a proper Name of someone. besides it was a way to introduce the audience to the rest of the verses, so the rhyme wasnt so im portant on that first one.

also also, why do you chose to put me down instead of complimenting 1 or 2 other good verses i may have written?

because he's a hater.

 

[TripleR]

Is this when fyrewolf takes silvers grammy and says beyonce should have won?

[radezz]

thanks guys. i got inspired :3 dont know why he hating tho. he and i have always been good

4 hours ago, TripleR said:

Is this when fyrewolf takes silvers grammy and says beyonce should have won?

lmfao

[MadOrNah]

2 minutes ago, TripleR said:

Is this when fyrewolf takes silvers grammy and says beyonce should have won?

this is when he claims he can do better than everyone who posted :"L

Edited April 2, 2017 by MadOrNah

[Fyrewolf5]

6 minutes ago, radezz said:

the hell is your problem @Fyrewolf5  ?

spitting sick is just me ironically showing off, as if id actually say that and mean it. 

also while it may not have been a perfect rhyme, it is totally acceptable in rap to rhyme a word with a proper Name of someone. besides it was a way to introduce the audience to the rest of the verses, so the rhyme wasnt so im portant on that first one.

also also, why do you chose to put me down instead of complimenting 1 or 2 other good verses i may have written?

Because it's not actually acceptable. It's bad and it's lazy and it could have been saved with a simple reordering to make it somewhat ok.
You could have done:

Though im no fifty cent,
I guess i'll represent.
For those fifty pds
Here's my two cents

Same lyrics, but now they actually have a structure that makes sense and works, and has way better flow (they way emphasis falls on lines 1+3 and 2+4, the repetition of fifty in 1+3 instead of 2+3, the syllable structure, etc.). Don't try to hide behind some Proper Name semantics. It's not just the fact that you did an identical rhyme, it's that you claimed you were gonna be "spitting sick" and then proceed to faceplant right out of the gate with an identical rhyme that could have been that easily fixed. If you are gonna do a dis verse, you better come with your best foot forward. That kind of fail deserves to be called out, that's all.

If you want a compliment about some part, the misspelling one letter line was pretty funny.

[radezz]

4 hours ago, Fyrewolf5 said:

Because it's not actually acceptable. It's bad and it's lazy and it could have been saved with a simple reordering to make it somewhat ok.
You could have done:

Though im no fifty cent,
I guess i'll represent.
For those fifty pds
Here's my two cents

Same lyrics, but now they actually have a structure that makes sense and works, and has way better flow (they way emphasis falls on lines 1+3 and 2+4, the repetition of fifty in 1+3 instead of 2+3, the syllable structure, etc.). Don't try to hide behind some Proper Name semantics. It's not just the fact that you did an identical rhyme, it's that you claimed you were gonna be "spitting sick" and then proceed to faceplant right out of the gate with an identical rhyme that could have been that easily fixed. If you are gonna do a dis verse, you better come with your best foot forward. That kind of fail deserves to be called out, that's all.

If you want a compliment about some part, the misspelling one letter line was pretty funny.

Jesus, right or wrong, i didnt know you were an ass

[Fyrewolf5]

1 minute ago, radezz said:

Jesus, right or wrong, i didnt know you were an ass

You asked me what my problem was, so I explained it in more detail. Call me an ass if you want, but you had a wack intro and I'm calling you out for it. If you can't handle someone booing, maybe you should prepare for the battle rap better.